Hey Friends! Here's a note from Andrea Caban about her upcoming FringeNYC show Questions my Mother Can't Answer! Check it out!
52 days until FringeNYC kicks off and I’m yet again jumping into the role of the lone wolf in the spotlight facing a pack protected by the dark. That notion used to scare me a lot more than it does in this moment. I think the story I’m telling in this piece and the journey of creating this piece for myself has helped me face a lot of fears about life & art. So laughing at myself and bearing my soul in front of a crowd of strangers, family and friends seems more like fun than anything else.
I’m in California now, reading the play for old friends and getting ready to learn it. Yes, I do have to make time to memorize the words I wrote. You’d think it would be a given, but no.
Through May and June, Rachel Eckerling, my lovely director helped me develop the arch of my story as it threads together the stories of the eight women I interviewed. And as soon as I get back to New York, I start rehearsals with Rachel, and the rest of my amazing team, including my Grammy award winning sound designer and my company manager who just happens to be my loving husband. So I’m a lucky woman, I know that.
But for now, I’m here in California re-connecting with old collaborators, classmates from grad school & dear friends, most of whom are women. In QMMCA, I’m searching for answers about how to be a good wife, when to be mother, and how to heal myself after a tragic event. As I snuggle into my old friendships here in Cali and indulge in some of this most-needed quality time that I’m ashamed I didn’t make a priority before now, I’m realizing in a very visceral way that all my friends are struggling with the same things I’m exploring in this piece. I knew that instinctively before coming out here, but now I really know. And I know the specifics. And I think we early thirty-somethings are taking a look at our lives and what we had expected our lives to be by this point, and it’s not always easy to take in the whole truth. Some of us are achieving everything we set out to and still haven’t found happiness, some of us are still looking for that one person to share life with, and some of us are in life or death situations because what we are is not at all what we expected to be.
I’m more inspired than ever to tell my story and be as honest and simple as I can be in hopes that it will push my girlfriends to face their stories and move beyond them. And their girlfriends and their boyfriends, and their mothers and their fathers. I have high hopes.
So I guess I’m really not very alone after all is this ‘solo’ piece. I can’t wait to share it with you.